OK, the cheese is willing to admit when he's wrong...or in this case, premature. But now, really, NOW, go check out this site. It's a work in progress that you're benevolent overlord's alter ego is, um, working on.
So go NOW!
Wednesday, August 01, 2007
Thursday, July 26, 2007
Behold and kneel in love and fear!
The day has finally come faithful citizens, the day you have all been awaiting anxiously (even if, ahem, you didn't know you were awaiting it).
Bow down in reverence before the glory of
NORMALITY RESTORED
Bow down in reverence before the glory of
NORMALITY RESTORED
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
Harry Potter is DEAD!
Well, maybe not dead in the "he's died" way...but the series is over (though Rowling said recently, when asked if she would ever write another HP book, "never say never").
So the cheese wonders what all you faithful citizens thought of "Deathly Hallows." Your benevolent overlord will expound his opinion down yonder, so look away if you haven't finished it yet....
Let's start with the deaths. The cheese has to admit that he suspected Lupin was going to bite the dust, and at least one of the Weasleys. So, no shocks there. Once it became clear that Tonks was pregnant, the cheese really didn't think she would go also, but that heartless Rowling likes to kill of sets of parents, apparently. As for Mad-Eye, can't say it was a big surprise, although coming so early in the book it really set the tone for the rest of the novel. As for Dobby, well, that might have been one of the biggest shocks in the whole series...and possibly the saddest moment.
And what about Snape? Well, it wasn't that big of a shock. Perhaps the mode of his death, bitten by Nagini, was a good twist. But everyone and his brother knew that Snape was good, probably had been in love with Harry's mom, and would do something important to help Harry in the last installment. Rowling did a good job of fulfilling those expectations, but then moving beyond them. Sure lot's of people figured Snape was in love with Lily, but who guessed they knew each other before Hogwarts, that Snape was the one to tell Lily of her true power, that they would be "best friends" even while at Hogwarts? And reflecting back on the series, Rowling played the balance of Snape wanting to protect Harry against Snape's anguish that Harry was Lily's child from another man (one whom Snape despised) really well. And Snape becomes, as one might expect, a fairly empathetic character. And what Harry says about him at the close of the book is true. Snape was damn courageous. Not only for what he did for the Order, but to come to Dumbledore in the first place. Really, even if you had doubts about Snape, once you found out his punishment to Neville, Luna and Ginny (for trying to steal the fake sword of Gryffindor) was to send them into the forbidden forest with Hagrid, well, come on, Harry and Malfoy had the same punishment when they were FIRST YEARS!
And Dumbledore....here, really was Rowling's masterstroke. The background and history on Dumbledore was necessary. If all we had ever seen of him was the wise, venerable, and caring old sorcerer of the first books then he'd have, essentially, been just a plot device with a soothing voice. But we see a real man, one of immense power who struggled in his youth to properly understand and harness his power. One who, in immaturity, caused loss had to deal with the outcome of his actions for his whole life. It's nice because, like every other character in the books, Dumbledore is portrayed just as humanly as Harry or anyone else. In book Six, we were given a peek into Voldemort's past, and those things that helped to shape him, and book Seven gives the same look into Dumbledore. What you realize, though, is that Rowling is championing every individual's choices as what sets one person as good or evil. Dumbledore could have easily turned into Grindelwald or Voldemort, but he chose to be a teacher instead. And we sympathize with Harry's anger at Dumbledore. We want our heroes, especially those like Dumbledore, to be good and pure and perfect, and we are quick to anger when they fail to meet our expectations, but Harry, by the story's end, comes to the realization that the best anyone can do is try and do what they believe is right.
All in all, Rowling is an engaging writer, and the book read well. In fact, the action was so strong in this one, that it seemed to read even faster than the shorter novels. And while much of it was predictable it ended, really, in the only way it could.
So the cheese wonders what all you faithful citizens thought of "Deathly Hallows." Your benevolent overlord will expound his opinion down yonder, so look away if you haven't finished it yet....
Let's start with the deaths. The cheese has to admit that he suspected Lupin was going to bite the dust, and at least one of the Weasleys. So, no shocks there. Once it became clear that Tonks was pregnant, the cheese really didn't think she would go also, but that heartless Rowling likes to kill of sets of parents, apparently. As for Mad-Eye, can't say it was a big surprise, although coming so early in the book it really set the tone for the rest of the novel. As for Dobby, well, that might have been one of the biggest shocks in the whole series...and possibly the saddest moment.
And what about Snape? Well, it wasn't that big of a shock. Perhaps the mode of his death, bitten by Nagini, was a good twist. But everyone and his brother knew that Snape was good, probably had been in love with Harry's mom, and would do something important to help Harry in the last installment. Rowling did a good job of fulfilling those expectations, but then moving beyond them. Sure lot's of people figured Snape was in love with Lily, but who guessed they knew each other before Hogwarts, that Snape was the one to tell Lily of her true power, that they would be "best friends" even while at Hogwarts? And reflecting back on the series, Rowling played the balance of Snape wanting to protect Harry against Snape's anguish that Harry was Lily's child from another man (one whom Snape despised) really well. And Snape becomes, as one might expect, a fairly empathetic character. And what Harry says about him at the close of the book is true. Snape was damn courageous. Not only for what he did for the Order, but to come to Dumbledore in the first place. Really, even if you had doubts about Snape, once you found out his punishment to Neville, Luna and Ginny (for trying to steal the fake sword of Gryffindor) was to send them into the forbidden forest with Hagrid, well, come on, Harry and Malfoy had the same punishment when they were FIRST YEARS!
And Dumbledore....here, really was Rowling's masterstroke. The background and history on Dumbledore was necessary. If all we had ever seen of him was the wise, venerable, and caring old sorcerer of the first books then he'd have, essentially, been just a plot device with a soothing voice. But we see a real man, one of immense power who struggled in his youth to properly understand and harness his power. One who, in immaturity, caused loss had to deal with the outcome of his actions for his whole life. It's nice because, like every other character in the books, Dumbledore is portrayed just as humanly as Harry or anyone else. In book Six, we were given a peek into Voldemort's past, and those things that helped to shape him, and book Seven gives the same look into Dumbledore. What you realize, though, is that Rowling is championing every individual's choices as what sets one person as good or evil. Dumbledore could have easily turned into Grindelwald or Voldemort, but he chose to be a teacher instead. And we sympathize with Harry's anger at Dumbledore. We want our heroes, especially those like Dumbledore, to be good and pure and perfect, and we are quick to anger when they fail to meet our expectations, but Harry, by the story's end, comes to the realization that the best anyone can do is try and do what they believe is right.
All in all, Rowling is an engaging writer, and the book read well. In fact, the action was so strong in this one, that it seemed to read even faster than the shorter novels. And while much of it was predictable it ended, really, in the only way it could.
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Wizard Rock
Every once in a while something comes along that restores the cheese small faith in humanity...and with the impending Harry Potter Pandemonium set to be released on the mass populace at 12:01 AM Saturday (local time), the cheese' introduction to Wizard Rock couldn't have come at a more appropriate time.
Special thanks to Gilgrim (wait...you don't know Gilgrim well, shit ladies, go find out) for the tip, list, and assorted synopses...
Special thanks to Gilgrim (wait...you don't know Gilgrim well, shit ladies, go find out) for the tip, list, and assorted synopses...
"WRock Awesomeness
Tom Riddle And Friends
http://www.myspace.com/tomriddleandfriends
well harmonized acoustic pseudo-folk
The Weird Sisters (aka Switchblade Kittens)
http://www.myspace.com/theweirdsisters
Shroud flavored uptempo, bass/keyboard heavy darkwave –old school electro-pop-goth. Very well produced and mastered (tone similar to Dressy Betsy).
theTonks
Folk, acoustic female band with well trained and controlled vocals – and nice arrangements. Mellow, and polished.
The Remus Lupins
http://www.myspace.com/theremuslupins
Indie – folk – pop, with digital/early electro influences. Voice reminiscent of early Nim Vind.
The Hufflepunks
http://www.myspace.com/hufflepunx
Old school pop-punk with influences from two-tone, the specials and some early Oingo and random Gnarles Barkley and hip-hop influences (read: Beck).
The Hinky Punks
http://www.myspace.com/hinkypunx
indie-folk-accoustic / emo. Early, early Weezer tones and feedback electric guitar. Melodies reminiscent of early Deathcab.
Ginny and the HeartBreakers
http://www.myspace.com/ginnyandtheheartbreakers
Lo-fi Le Tigre influenced acoustic punk with indie electro influences. Bonus points for making ref to Daniel Radcliffe’s performance in La Equis.
The Fizzing Whizbees
http://www.myspace.com/thefizzingwhizbees
Punk lo-fi inspired, male version of Le Tigre with more acoustic stylings and a folk sensibility in the lyrics.
The Cruciatus Curse
http://www.myspace.com/thecruciatus
Listed as metal but much closer to mid-year industrial and a light version of Acumen Nation. Goth influenced, pop-industrial, with a bent to more old-school electronica.
Severely Snaped
http://www.myspace.com/severelysnapedwizardrock
Classic rock influenced metal/hard rock. Pulling musical stylings and their visual presence from the darker side of the early-mid seventies rock scene – some obvious influences from early goth acts like Christian Death with some Judas and Maiden thrown in for fun.
Roonil Wazlib
http://www.myspace.com/roonilwazlibrock
Accoustic –solo-guitar-comedic-folk. Female vocalist, 90’s era coffee-shoppe bo-ho pseudo-hippie/fem-rock natural sounding vocals and interesting timber. (Voted best new artist 2007- Wizrocklopedia People’s Choice Awards)
Remus and the Lupins
http://www.myspace.com/remusandthelupins
Pop-experimental electro influenced. Heavy voice modulation, basic, but consitent and light-hearted programming showing some influences from very late 70’s early 80’s arrangements by electric bands like Manheim Steam Roller. (from
Ginny and the Weasleys
http://www.myspace.com/hermioneandthegrangers
Ecclectic weirdness as the first ‘virtual band’ in Wrock (inspired by the Gorilllaz) with all songs from Ginny’s perspective (female vocalist) – bizarre range of synth sounds similar to Stephanie / early mid 80’s idol pop from
Bella and the Death Eaters
http://www.myspace.com/bellaandthedeatheaters
Accoustic folk-emo – two female vocalists with guitar accompaniment. Untrained vocals and melodies – mixed bag…
Potter and the Lightning Bolts
http://www.myspace.com/potterandthelightningbolts
Pop-punk rock, with polished production, lo-fi garage sound and good arrangements with variations towards acoustic/comedy-folk.
The Quidditch Pitch Incident
http://www.myspace.com/thequidditchpitchincident
Accoustic reverse white-stripes dynamic with female lead vocalist, arrangements closer to Dressy Betsy/Le Tigre – lo-fi recording and mastering, perhaps purposefully awkward(?).
Dobby and the House Elves
http://www.myspace.com/dobbyandthehouseelves
Electronic influenced pop-rock. Well arranged, decently produced. Lyrics and melodies are reminiscent of folk (Simon and Garfunkle) and early hip-hop (Grandmaster Flash / Blondie) mixed with a range spreading from early electronica and funk heavy 70’s disco/modern house and Moby/Fatboy Slim. Voice modulated for elfish quality.
The Fleur Delacours
http://www.myspace.com/thefleurdelacours
Le Tigre inspired female–indie-avante punk, smashed with plenty of cowbell, garage recording, and energy.
Mostly Muggles
http://www.myspace.com/mostlymuggles
Garage rock influenced jam-rock band. Stylings vary from old-school rock/blues and rockabilly to jam-styled 70’s garage with super lo-fi recording and production.
Draco and the Malfoys
http://www.myspace.com/dracoandthemalfoysusa
Similar to a slower more acoustic/basic electric version of They Might Be Giants.
Dumbledork
http://www.myspace.com/dumbleeedork
Lo-fi electronica/experimental. Well produced, breakbeat influences and solid electro-clash, with some more progressive and industrial flourishes, reminiscent of Psychic TV. Very nicely produced, mostly instrumental- some arrangements sound like earl john carpenter or Goblin scores.
DJ Luna Lovegood
http://www.myspace.com/djlovegood
Experimental –electro-heavy punk-folk. Well arranged, with some early goth smatterings. Ecclectic mixes with guitar – electric/acoustic, bass and samples.
Voldemort – Wizard Metal
http://www.myspace.com/voldemorttruemetal
Basic metal inspired – pseudo horror punk comedy act.
The Mudbloods
http://www.myspace.com/mudbloods
Well polished indie-folk with electric overtones. Good arrangements and melodies, vocals reminiscent of Deathcab.
Death Eaters Anon
http://www.myspace.com/deatheatersanon
Comedic similar to Doctor Demento. Eclectic hodge-podge some influences ranging from Swithblade Symphony and Rasputina.
Sir Nick
http://www.myspace.com/nearlyheadlessnick
Electronica, sample heavy, experimental, not always well arranged or mixed, more underground DIY, obvious loops from Acid. Uneven, but with some promise, with the more ethereal songs.
For more Wizard Rock goodness - http://wizardrock.org/"
Thursday, July 12, 2007
allofmp3.com We Hardly Knew Ye
So sometime around the 2nd of July the cheese favorite music site, allofmp3.com went down. The same thing happened last May, though the site made it back up. This time, though, it appears that the Russian government pulled the plug.
In case you don't know what allofmp3 is/was, the cheese'll break it down for you.
The average cost of a single music track on itunes is .99 cents, and an album is 9.99. Now, allofmp3 would sell tracks for .15 cents (yeah, that right FIFTEEN CENTS) and albums for around 3 or 4 dollars. The really great thing about allofmp3, though, was the options. You could buy a track for fifteen cents, but that might be a 128 kb bitrate, or you could spend fifty cents on 256 kb track, etc. And you weren't only limited to mp3's, they had something like 7 different file type options. Also, they didn't put and DMR encoding on any of their tracks, so once you downloaded a track, it was yours forever. The best thing about it, though, was that since the company was operated out of Russia, they had a lot of music from outside the US, specifically from Europe and England. So you weren't stuck with the crap you hear on suck-ass US radio.
Now, allofmp3 was a Russian company, and operated legally within Russian copyright law. Of course, because these laws are unsavory to both the RIAA and major US recording companies (read: doesn't pay out enough), the RIAA has, for three years, put pressure on the Russian government to shut down allofmp3. They even went so far as filing a 1.64 trillion (yes, trillion with a t) dollar law suit against allofmp3 in NY (a response by an executive at allofmp3's parent company went something like, "they're free to do what they want, but it seems pointless for them to sue us in New York when we operate legally in Russia").
Of course, now the site is down, and will probably not be back. There are similar sites that operate in Russia, and while some offer similar pricing, none have the same huge catalog or as many options as allofmp3 had.
The real sad thing, though, is how much the whole episode illuminates just how out of touch media companies are. Allofmp3 had a huge following of people who would have otherwise just gotten their music illegally (and, freely, the cheese might add), but had no problem paying for stuff at allofmp3. By forcing allofmp3 to go down, the RIAA simply made this large group of people even more pissed about having to pay for content. Rather than actually working with the Russian government, allofmp3 itself, and the artists to find a reasonable compromise that would allow allofmp3 to continue to operate (even if it was at a small price increase), the RIAA decided to be a bunch of dicks.
At some point, the media companies will understand that the old business models no longer work. Digital media/the internet requires that these companies approach royalties and copyright in fundamentally different ways. Obviously, the companies do not want to face the truth, but eventually, after so much money lost on frivolous legal expenditures, they'll figure it out.
Until then, the cheese is going back to bit torrent...or, he would if he had internet at home right now.
In case you don't know what allofmp3 is/was, the cheese'll break it down for you.
The average cost of a single music track on itunes is .99 cents, and an album is 9.99. Now, allofmp3 would sell tracks for .15 cents (yeah, that right FIFTEEN CENTS) and albums for around 3 or 4 dollars. The really great thing about allofmp3, though, was the options. You could buy a track for fifteen cents, but that might be a 128 kb bitrate, or you could spend fifty cents on 256 kb track, etc. And you weren't only limited to mp3's, they had something like 7 different file type options. Also, they didn't put and DMR encoding on any of their tracks, so once you downloaded a track, it was yours forever. The best thing about it, though, was that since the company was operated out of Russia, they had a lot of music from outside the US, specifically from Europe and England. So you weren't stuck with the crap you hear on suck-ass US radio.
Now, allofmp3 was a Russian company, and operated legally within Russian copyright law. Of course, because these laws are unsavory to both the RIAA and major US recording companies (read: doesn't pay out enough), the RIAA has, for three years, put pressure on the Russian government to shut down allofmp3. They even went so far as filing a 1.64 trillion (yes, trillion with a t) dollar law suit against allofmp3 in NY (a response by an executive at allofmp3's parent company went something like, "they're free to do what they want, but it seems pointless for them to sue us in New York when we operate legally in Russia").
Of course, now the site is down, and will probably not be back. There are similar sites that operate in Russia, and while some offer similar pricing, none have the same huge catalog or as many options as allofmp3 had.
The real sad thing, though, is how much the whole episode illuminates just how out of touch media companies are. Allofmp3 had a huge following of people who would have otherwise just gotten their music illegally (and, freely, the cheese might add), but had no problem paying for stuff at allofmp3. By forcing allofmp3 to go down, the RIAA simply made this large group of people even more pissed about having to pay for content. Rather than actually working with the Russian government, allofmp3 itself, and the artists to find a reasonable compromise that would allow allofmp3 to continue to operate (even if it was at a small price increase), the RIAA decided to be a bunch of dicks.
At some point, the media companies will understand that the old business models no longer work. Digital media/the internet requires that these companies approach royalties and copyright in fundamentally different ways. Obviously, the companies do not want to face the truth, but eventually, after so much money lost on frivolous legal expenditures, they'll figure it out.
Until then, the cheese is going back to bit torrent...or, he would if he had internet at home right now.
Thursday, July 05, 2007
Yet another reason why cheeselandia may, one day, relocate to the British Isles...
What the hell is it about pasty white English folk making horribly catchy-ass electronic style musik?
Remember Fatboy Slim?
Well, what about The Streets...
(see how Dave has NO idea who he's introducing...and nice self-censorship by Mr. Skinner)
And everyone's favorite drunken British girl, Lily Allen...
But now all you faithful citizens can add a new artist to those you adore, Scroobius Pip!
Remember Fatboy Slim?
Well, what about The Streets...
(see how Dave has NO idea who he's introducing...and nice self-censorship by Mr. Skinner)
And everyone's favorite drunken British girl, Lily Allen...
But now all you faithful citizens can add a new artist to those you adore, Scroobius Pip!
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Another Potter Prediction
Here's another idea about how book seven will end. This is theory only and has no grounding in any knowledge of the seventh book.
Keith Olbermann at msnbc has pieced together his own theory of how the book ends. He bases a lot of it on financial concerns, but his final theory incorporates a lot of my own theories and put a spin on it I hadn't thought of. Here it is:
(I'll put a little space in here in case you don't really want to spoil the ending.)
Keith Olbermann at msnbc has pieced together his own theory of how the book ends. He bases a lot of it on financial concerns, but his final theory incorporates a lot of my own theories and put a spin on it I hadn't thought of. Here it is:
(I'll put a little space in here in case you don't really want to spoil the ending.)
So why not this ending? Harry eliminates all but one of Voldemort’s horcruxes. The dark lord’s life is now reduced to this undulating welt on Harry’s own forehead. To kill Voldemort, Harry must kill himself and is about to, as millions of readers recoil in horror and anger, when who steps out of the shadows but Snape to explain to Harry that there is another way that the last horcrux, Harry’s scar, can be removed, but at one dreadful price. Harry can survive it, but his magical skills cannot. To finally vanquish Voldemort, save Hogwarts and Hermione and Ron, and, in fact the magical world, to say nothing of the J.K. Rowling franchise for decades and generations to come, Harry Potter must give up being a wizard.
So what do we all think?
Thursday, June 21, 2007
Harry Potter end revealed....
Or maybe this guy just has his head up his ass. It's hard to understand exactly what he says since, apparently, hackers no longer feel the need to use any semblance of intelligible language, but the gist of it is.....
don't read further if you don't want spoilers....
you're still reading......
maybe these are crap.....
maybe not.....
anyway, Snape kills Hagrid, Voldemort kills Hermoine (who dies to save Ron) and then Ron (possibly, again it's hard to understand this guys synopsis), and Harry ultimately kills Snape and Voldemort.
Seems reasonable enough to the cheese, except the Hermoine thing...well Rowling has said before that she's a lot more "vulnerable" (her exact word) then most people think...so maybe the guy did get something right here. Of course Bloomsbury and Scholastic deny the claims...only time will tell.
don't read further if you don't want spoilers....
you're still reading......
maybe these are crap.....
maybe not.....
anyway, Snape kills Hagrid, Voldemort kills Hermoine (who dies to save Ron) and then Ron (possibly, again it's hard to understand this guys synopsis), and Harry ultimately kills Snape and Voldemort.
Seems reasonable enough to the cheese, except the Hermoine thing...well Rowling has said before that she's a lot more "vulnerable" (her exact word) then most people think...so maybe the guy did get something right here. Of course Bloomsbury and Scholastic deny the claims...only time will tell.
Thursday, June 14, 2007
First Thing...
The cheese just really likes this picture...
And two....have you figured out how to log back in yet Suavo?
And two....have you figured out how to log back in yet Suavo?
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
Tuesday, June 05, 2007
Obi-wan is Hardcore
After riding a motocycle from London to New York, Ewan Mcgregor is at it again. This time he's riding from Scotland to Cape Town, South Africa on a motorcycle. You can track his progress on the bbc website and also read blog posts of the trip as well.
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
Two things
First off, the cheese commends exsulis on his use of the cheeselandia national flag.
Secondly, the cheese is getting rid of a bunch of old PC games...if anyone wants them, the cheese suggests they come by his house tomorrow (or today, Wednesday, since it's now after midnight) to peruse the titles, or else they're all going to the salvation army on Thursday.
Secondly, the cheese is getting rid of a bunch of old PC games...if anyone wants them, the cheese suggests they come by his house tomorrow (or today, Wednesday, since it's now after midnight) to peruse the titles, or else they're all going to the salvation army on Thursday.
Saturday, May 26, 2007
Friday, May 25, 2007
Happy Birthday Star Wars
I don't know what else I can say but Happy Birthday Star Wars and thank you for the years of entertainment.
With the Cheese's permission, I would like to declare today to be a state holiday in the mighty kingdom of Cheeselandia. In celebration of the day, I would urge each citizen of this great land to watch at least one of the star wars movies today. If not that, then at least take the time to watch these brilliant parodies:
With the Cheese's permission, I would like to declare today to be a state holiday in the mighty kingdom of Cheeselandia. In celebration of the day, I would urge each citizen of this great land to watch at least one of the star wars movies today. If not that, then at least take the time to watch these brilliant parodies:
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
LFC
Tomorrow, at around 11:30 AM (Pacific) the valiant club from Liverpool will, for the second time in three years, meet AC Milan in the European Champions League final. The cheese does not have to remind his faithful citizens that, last time, the Reds overcame a three goal half-time deficit to mark one of the most memorable comebacks in European history.
Even though LFC only managed a third place in the Premier League this season, this is a much better, and more importantly, deeper Liverpool squad then the one Rafa Benitez fielded two years ago. Three legitimate strike threats, in Crouch, Kuyt and Bellamy, are on the Reds roster, along with more than one (Harry Kewell) actual winger. The Reds defense hasn't been as dominant this term, but Pepe Reina is a much more stable presence between the sticks than Jerzy Dudek ever was. In part, the team LFC runs out will depend on whether or not Sissoko and Zenden are fit. Even still, the match may come down to the mid-field show down between our own wonder captain Steven Gerrard, and Milan's ridiculously dangerous Kaka.
Milan put in a real beat down on Man U in the semi's, so Liverpool will have to be focused. But the Reds have already topped Barcelona and Chelsea in this year's tournament, and something about these big European nights seem to bring the best out in the lads.
So join the cheese, won't you faithful citizens, and give your support to Liverpool.
Even though LFC only managed a third place in the Premier League this season, this is a much better, and more importantly, deeper Liverpool squad then the one Rafa Benitez fielded two years ago. Three legitimate strike threats, in Crouch, Kuyt and Bellamy, are on the Reds roster, along with more than one (Harry Kewell) actual winger. The Reds defense hasn't been as dominant this term, but Pepe Reina is a much more stable presence between the sticks than Jerzy Dudek ever was. In part, the team LFC runs out will depend on whether or not Sissoko and Zenden are fit. Even still, the match may come down to the mid-field show down between our own wonder captain Steven Gerrard, and Milan's ridiculously dangerous Kaka.
Milan put in a real beat down on Man U in the semi's, so Liverpool will have to be focused. But the Reds have already topped Barcelona and Chelsea in this year's tournament, and something about these big European nights seem to bring the best out in the lads.
So join the cheese, won't you faithful citizens, and give your support to Liverpool.
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
Jerry Falwell: Dead
Can’t say as the cheese is particularly sad, really. In the grand scheme of things, death is sad, sure. And there are, no doubt, family members and what not who are terribly saddened by the death of Falwell, but...well...this is the guy who said shit like...
(re: 9/11 attacks) "...throwing God out of the public square, out of the schools, the abortionists have got to bear some burden for this because God will not be mocked and when we destroy 40 million little innocent babies, we make God mad...I really believe that the pagans and the abortionists and the feminists and the gays and the lesbians who are actively trying to make that an alternative lifestyle, the ACLU, People for the American Way, all of them who try to secularize America...I point the thing in their face and say you helped this happen."
Really? Huh...cause the cheese thought that it mostly came out of our “black ops” dealing with Mid-east countries in the 80’s (Iran, Afghanistan, etc.) and that we basically treated those people like our bitches and broke ALL of our promises to them
and...
"The ACLU is to Christians what the American Nazi party is to Jews”
Well, the cheese isn’t a member of the ACLU, but the last time he checked, they didn’t advocate the rounding up and systematic execution of all Christians, but maybe they recently put something on their website about it...
oh, and don’t forget...
“If you're not a born-again Christian, you're a failure as a human being”
Hmm...someone should pull Ghandi out of his grave and let him know...
Although, I have to disagree with Alan’s assertion that he should die twice...once seems sufficient for most everyone.
(re: 9/11 attacks) "...throwing God out of the public square, out of the schools, the abortionists have got to bear some burden for this because God will not be mocked and when we destroy 40 million little innocent babies, we make God mad...I really believe that the pagans and the abortionists and the feminists and the gays and the lesbians who are actively trying to make that an alternative lifestyle, the ACLU, People for the American Way, all of them who try to secularize America...I point the thing in their face and say you helped this happen."
Really? Huh...cause the cheese thought that it mostly came out of our “black ops” dealing with Mid-east countries in the 80’s (Iran, Afghanistan, etc.) and that we basically treated those people like our bitches and broke ALL of our promises to them
and...
"The ACLU is to Christians what the American Nazi party is to Jews”
Well, the cheese isn’t a member of the ACLU, but the last time he checked, they didn’t advocate the rounding up and systematic execution of all Christians, but maybe they recently put something on their website about it...
oh, and don’t forget...
“If you're not a born-again Christian, you're a failure as a human being”
Hmm...someone should pull Ghandi out of his grave and let him know...
Although, I have to disagree with Alan’s assertion that he should die twice...once seems sufficient for most everyone.
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
WTF??????
File this news story under, "What the fuck is wrong with people?"
I saw this story on Mojo's newswire and I had to post it here and vent.
I understand being vegan, but I thought part of the point was not taking from animals "without permission." You would think that it would be okay to nurse because the mother is freely giving the milk. I would even go so far as to say that vegans might be okay with drinking human milk since it wasn't acquired through exploitation of the giver. Failing all that, you would think that if they are choosing to live a strict vegan lifestyle and raise their child in that lifestyle, then they would do a little research on how to do it safely. Plus you would think they would have thought something was wrong when their baby weighed less than half the average BIRTH weight. I don't have any kids but this just tears at me. It really makes one want to force all would be parents into to parenting classes with some sort of licensing exam at the end of it.
I saw this story on Mojo's newswire and I had to post it here and vent.
This Buckhead newborn didn't stand a chance.
By the time he saw a doctor, the 6-week-old, born at home, was dead. Fed a diet consisting largely of soy milk and apple juice by his vegan parents, the baby boy weighed just 3 1/2 pounds.
Fulton prosecutors say it's a chilling case of murder by starvation, a painful and prolonged death. Attorneys representing parents Jade Sanders, 27, and Lamont Thomas, 31, told jurors the first-time parents did the best they could while adhering to their vegan lifestyle. Vegans typically live free of animal products.
"They're not vegans, they're baby killers," Fulton prosecutor Mike Carlson told the jury Tuesday during his closing arguments."Think about how long they had to listen to his screams and hollers."
Thomas hung his head and appeared to nearly collapse on the defense table during
closing arguments, while Sanders sat next to him listening intently. The couple's attorneys claim the parents didn't realize their baby, named Crown, was in danger until minutes before he died.Jurors began deliberations Tuesday. Prosecutors urged jurors to convict the parents of murder, which carries an automatic life sentence in prison. Defense lawyers told jurors the death is at most a case of involuntary manslaughter, reckless conduct that results in an unintentional death, punishable by up to one year in jail.
I understand being vegan, but I thought part of the point was not taking from animals "without permission." You would think that it would be okay to nurse because the mother is freely giving the milk. I would even go so far as to say that vegans might be okay with drinking human milk since it wasn't acquired through exploitation of the giver. Failing all that, you would think that if they are choosing to live a strict vegan lifestyle and raise their child in that lifestyle, then they would do a little research on how to do it safely. Plus you would think they would have thought something was wrong when their baby weighed less than half the average BIRTH weight. I don't have any kids but this just tears at me. It really makes one want to force all would be parents into to parenting classes with some sort of licensing exam at the end of it.
Tuesday, May 01, 2007
Because one blog isn't enough
The cheese' alter ego, james, has begun posting to a blog. Entirely unlike the going's on here in cheeselandia, this blog can be found at here. May be of only mild interest to most of you faithful citizens, since very few of you have children, but you might want to head over there at some point to support a brotha!
Friday, April 27, 2007
Order of the Science Scouts of Exemplary Repute And Above Average Physique
Thanks Mojo for finding this!!!
not opposed to alcohol.
- fond of IPCC reports (especially the pictures).
- mostly in agreement with the "truth."
- into badges.
- grieving for the slow and miserable death of the Hubble Space Telescope.
- possibly possessed of supernatural powers.
- not in the business of total world domination
- committed to the constant and diligent presentation of science stories, be it to editors, producers, directors, educators, relatives and/or friends of various ilk, in an effort to lessen the gap that is this thing we call public scientific literacy.
and they have badges!
The "MacGyver" badge.
In which the recipient has demonstrated that his/her science communciation prowess was handy in simplifying a potentially challenging scenario. For example, was able to escape from unjustified prison term, with the clever use of a paper clip and WD-40. You know, that kind of thing. (Note that display of badge must be accompanied by explanation).
The "arts and crafts" badge.
Because you can't have a bunch of badges without an arts and crafts badge. This one assumes the recipient has all manner of "craftiness" with a sciencegeek twist.
The "I'm pretty confident around an open flame" badge.
Recipients have demonstrated proficiency around open flames in laboratory settings.
The "totally digs highly exothermic reactions" badge.
Might be best to keep an eye on such recipients.
The "I work with way too much radioactivity, and yet still no discernable superpowers yet" badge.
...Although not for lack of trying...
not opposed to alcohol.
- fond of IPCC reports (especially the pictures).
- mostly in agreement with the "truth."
- into badges.
- grieving for the slow and miserable death of the Hubble Space Telescope.
- possibly possessed of supernatural powers.
- not in the business of total world domination
- committed to the constant and diligent presentation of science stories, be it to editors, producers, directors, educators, relatives and/or friends of various ilk, in an effort to lessen the gap that is this thing we call public scientific literacy.
and they have badges!
The "MacGyver" badge.
In which the recipient has demonstrated that his/her science communciation prowess was handy in simplifying a potentially challenging scenario. For example, was able to escape from unjustified prison term, with the clever use of a paper clip and WD-40. You know, that kind of thing. (Note that display of badge must be accompanied by explanation).
The "arts and crafts" badge.
Because you can't have a bunch of badges without an arts and crafts badge. This one assumes the recipient has all manner of "craftiness" with a sciencegeek twist.
The "I'm pretty confident around an open flame" badge.
Recipients have demonstrated proficiency around open flames in laboratory settings.
The "totally digs highly exothermic reactions" badge.
Might be best to keep an eye on such recipients.
The "I work with way too much radioactivity, and yet still no discernable superpowers yet" badge.
...Although not for lack of trying...
RELATED?
This is a brief blub for a new show on adult swim:
• Lucy, the Daughter of the Devil: Lucy is living in San Francisco and dating a great new guy, who might just be the Second Coming. The only problem is that her dad always meddles in her life. And, since he’s Satan, he is using her relationship as an excuse to hasten the apocalypse. This previously announced series, created by Loren Bouchard, is set to debut this summer.
This almost sounds like something out of the chronicles. It's even set in San Fransisco, a city dear to the Cheese's heart.
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
Seriously?
Damn, exsulis are you ever bored! It took the cheese like 20 minutes to find his log-on for that damn thing...should probably just delete it anyway.
Syndication Biatch!
Click on the link and get all your updated cheeselandia news and happenings as them...um...happen.
Monday, April 16, 2007
Because Swearing Kids are Funny
What do you get if you cross Will Ferrell and a swearing toddler? Well this.
Saturday, April 14, 2007
As an addendum to the previous post...
possibly the funniest thing to ever use both words and images...
Friday, April 13, 2007
And now for something a little lighter.
Oh the cheese dreams of the day he can write even 1/8 as well as PA!
Imus fired, but Rosie still on the air
With Imus being fired for an off the cuff, racially insensitive remark I once again get alarmed at the continued death of free speech. If you've listened to the transcripts of his show that morning concerning the Rutger's women team, he just made a poor mistake in words. Now, I'm no fan of Don Imus but hasn't Howard Stern or for that matter other radio celebrities said worse things with malicious intention? Also, how does Al Sharpton get to call himself a "Reverend"? Shouldn't that imply some form of forgiveness and willingness to accept a way to seek redemption? Yet, he goes on a holier than thou crusade to influence the firing of Imus from not only his televised MSNBC show, but from radio via CBS. Apparently, the good "reverend" has forgotten that Imus has a ranch for terminally ill children with his wife. Finally, why does Imus get fired, yet Rosie can continue on air even after this?
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
And yet the world continues on...
The cheese admits that even though he has not read everything written by Kurt Vonnegut, the man still held a special place in the cheese' heart for being simultaneously funny, serious, fantastical, and utterly cynical in everything he did.
So, it would figure that, after a day in which the cheese was forced into a psuedo-confrontation with his stubborn ass of a father in law, he would then come home and in an attempt to wind down before bed spend a few minutes on the internet only to find that Kurt Vonnegut has died.
Honestly, there really aren't words.
This isn't nearly as shocking as when Douglas Adams (a notorious fitness freak who died of a heart attack at the age 49) passed. After all, Vonnegut did make it to the age of 84, and he even (half-heartedly) attempted suicide once.
But it's still one of those things that hits hard. Mostly because Vonnegut was one of the few writers the cheese ever felt a real kinship with. That's not the same as merely admiring or respecting someone. No, the cheese felt that he and Vonnegut were, basically (and this isn't an ego thing, really) of the same lineage, writing wise; skeptical comic fantasy (or sci-fi in Vonnegut's case) with just a hint of optimism. It's not like everyone writes that kind of thing, or, more importantly, are drawn to write that kind of thing.
So, here's to you Mr. Vonnegut (and Kilgore Trout, Billy Pilgrim, and all the rest). Hopefully you'll end up somewhere that doesn't let you down as often as this place did.
So, it would figure that, after a day in which the cheese was forced into a psuedo-confrontation with his stubborn ass of a father in law, he would then come home and in an attempt to wind down before bed spend a few minutes on the internet only to find that Kurt Vonnegut has died.
Honestly, there really aren't words.
This isn't nearly as shocking as when Douglas Adams (a notorious fitness freak who died of a heart attack at the age 49) passed. After all, Vonnegut did make it to the age of 84, and he even (half-heartedly) attempted suicide once.
But it's still one of those things that hits hard. Mostly because Vonnegut was one of the few writers the cheese ever felt a real kinship with. That's not the same as merely admiring or respecting someone. No, the cheese felt that he and Vonnegut were, basically (and this isn't an ego thing, really) of the same lineage, writing wise; skeptical comic fantasy (or sci-fi in Vonnegut's case) with just a hint of optimism. It's not like everyone writes that kind of thing, or, more importantly, are drawn to write that kind of thing.
So, here's to you Mr. Vonnegut (and Kilgore Trout, Billy Pilgrim, and all the rest). Hopefully you'll end up somewhere that doesn't let you down as often as this place did.
Wednesday, April 04, 2007
More thoughts on the racist sci-fi writer.
The more the cheese thinks about it, the more he realizes that the whole "I hate black people" stuff isn't actually what bothers him. It's speech, and regardless of its contents, speech is free. In fact, the cheese has long advocated the creation a federally funded Television network called BBS, the Bigot Broadcasting System. Basically, the BBS is only allowed to broadcast bigoted themed shows of all kinds, racist, homophobic, misogynist, etc. The point is that, with so much air time, it will become absolutely clear how hugely ridiculous every kind of hate monger truly is.
But back to the matter at hand, this Ken Eng. As the cheese said, the actual hate speech doesn't bother him. In fact, it appears that the said "I hate black people" article was actually an editorial, which is supposed to be(in some grand, theoretical universe) a singular person's opinion. Not the opinion of a paper, or it's staff, janitors, what have you. And the paper in question openly decided to run a piece it clearly knew would cause an uproar, then went on to fire the writer once the backlash got too big. Hey, Asian Week, grow some balls and stick behind your racist or don't run his crap in the first place. In some ways, you gotta respect the KKK cause they always say what they believe, no matter how fucking stupid those beliefs may be.
And that, the cheese thinks, is the real problem. Speech isn't really free in this country. If the cheese threatened the president, for instance, he could be jailed. But even more disheartening is the fact that only the oddballs on the fringes of society can really say what they want anymore because they know they’re pissing people off anyway. The rest of us have watch what we say, tone down our words, water down our thoughts, so that we stay in the boundaries that keep us all “content” and “happy.”
Say what you will, but it’s the first slow plodding step on the road to fascism. So to combat this the cheese suggests all loyal citizens of cheeselandia post in the comments something you truly believe. If your belief happens to offend someone, so be it. We’re all adults here, the cheese thinks we can all take it. The cheese will start...
There isn't a single elected official in Washington (or Sacramento, or any state capital for that matter) that actually cares about you, the voter. They might claim high minded ideals, but every single one of them (liberal, conservative, "independent") are addicted to wielding power and influence, money, and status. They do what they do for personal reasons and would shit on your face if it were part of the gig.
But back to the matter at hand, this Ken Eng. As the cheese said, the actual hate speech doesn't bother him. In fact, it appears that the said "I hate black people" article was actually an editorial, which is supposed to be(in some grand, theoretical universe) a singular person's opinion. Not the opinion of a paper, or it's staff, janitors, what have you. And the paper in question openly decided to run a piece it clearly knew would cause an uproar, then went on to fire the writer once the backlash got too big. Hey, Asian Week, grow some balls and stick behind your racist or don't run his crap in the first place. In some ways, you gotta respect the KKK cause they always say what they believe, no matter how fucking stupid those beliefs may be.
And that, the cheese thinks, is the real problem. Speech isn't really free in this country. If the cheese threatened the president, for instance, he could be jailed. But even more disheartening is the fact that only the oddballs on the fringes of society can really say what they want anymore because they know they’re pissing people off anyway. The rest of us have watch what we say, tone down our words, water down our thoughts, so that we stay in the boundaries that keep us all “content” and “happy.”
Say what you will, but it’s the first slow plodding step on the road to fascism. So to combat this the cheese suggests all loyal citizens of cheeselandia post in the comments something you truly believe. If your belief happens to offend someone, so be it. We’re all adults here, the cheese thinks we can all take it. The cheese will start...
There isn't a single elected official in Washington (or Sacramento, or any state capital for that matter) that actually cares about you, the voter. They might claim high minded ideals, but every single one of them (liberal, conservative, "independent") are addicted to wielding power and influence, money, and status. They do what they do for personal reasons and would shit on your face if it were part of the gig.
Don't we all want to know
how the "philosophy of Dragons: Lexicon Triumvirate" relates to being a racist? Although, after watching the video the cheese wonders if
A)Everything this guy wrote was total bullshit/sarcasm
or
B)He tried to create a controversy to drum up book sales.
Hey stranger things have happened than either of those two scenarios, and it seems odd that someone as seemingly insane as he is in the video could get a job at a reputable news outlet without there being something running in the subtext....the paper even let his by-line read "God of the Universe" for christ's sake!
Thanks to ever vigilant guys at Poor Mojo's Newswire for the vid!
A)Everything this guy wrote was total bullshit/sarcasm
or
B)He tried to create a controversy to drum up book sales.
Hey stranger things have happened than either of those two scenarios, and it seems odd that someone as seemingly insane as he is in the video could get a job at a reputable news outlet without there being something running in the subtext....the paper even let his by-line read "God of the Universe" for christ's sake!
Thanks to ever vigilant guys at Poor Mojo's Newswire for the vid!
MLB Part II
And now for the cheese' AL predictions...
AL East
1. New York Yankees (ARod hit .290/35/121 in a "bad season," add to that greater pitching depth and a somewhat younger, and probably healthier, lineup and the Yanks will win their 10th! division crown in a row)
2. Boston Red Sox - Wild Card Berth (better rotation, upgraded lineup [though one can pray JD Drew goes down with a season ending injury] and Papelbon back in the bullpen will see the Bo'Sox back to the playoffs)
3. Toronto Blue Jays (poor Jay's fans, no matter how much money you spend you can't catch the behemoths on top, at least Halliday might win another Cy Young)
4. Tampa Bay Devil Rays (look at that, the D-Rays have some nice young talent, and Scott Kazmir could have a break out year, so a non-last place finish is entirely possible)
5. Baltimore Orioles (its a sad state of affairs when the O's look worse than the Devil Rays, if Cal Ripken were dead he'd be rolling in his grave, Eric Bedard and Miguel Tejada should both demand trades so they don't waste any more productive years in Angelos' cursed shadow)
Overall Breakdown - Comes down to NY and Beantown, as everyone assumed it would. The Yanks lost some bat in trading Sheffield, but they don't hurt for firepower, and the improved rotation and bench depth make them the team to beat. For the other non-NY and Boston teams, they should simply be moved to other divisions so that they might make the post season more than once every lunar eclipse. Of course, not into the AL Central cause, god is that a scary division.
AL Central
1. Minnesota Twins (yes they have rotation concerns past a certain left-handed wizard named Santana, but they have a ton of hitters, a great manager and GM, and they played absolutely hellish in the second half last year, plus 4 division titles in 6 years ain't nothin' to scoff at)
2. Detroit Tigers (last years pennant winners should have walked away with the division, but were overtaken by the Twins on the final day of the season, no reason to think they can't win the division other than the Twins being so good and so experienced in pennant drives)
3. Cleveland Indians (their run differential from a year ago points to them having some tough breaks in 06, if Sabathia has a solid season this is a team poised for a break...or would be in they didn't play in this division)
4. Chicago White Sox (two years ago they won a WS title, this offseason they made moves that might turn out to be genius in a year or two but weakened their pitching in the short term, would probably run away with a division crown in just about any other division, but...)
5. Kansas City Royals (poor Royals fans, nearly 20 years of suckage, at least that profit sharing has allowed them to spend some money, although poorly [Gil Meche, really?], but maybe they can hold on to some of that talent starting to crop up out of their farm system
Overall Breakdown - This is a division that could produce a 90 win team in 4th place, and send only one team into the playoffs, it's just that scary good. In fact, any of the top four are interchangeable in some regards. Bit like the NL Central, actually, but here it's because everyone's so talented, as opposed to the mediocrity that reigns in the NL counterpart.
AL West
1. Oakland Athletics (no concrete reason to pick them, other than the fact that Billy Beane's still GM over in Oaktown)
2. Anaheim Angels of Anaheim CA in Orange County where Anaheim is (more talent, on paper, than the A's, but the cheese thinks Gary Matthews Jr. is going to be a bust, Garrett Anderson is in decline, and there's no real protection for Vlad, plus Colon's 350 lbs. is going to wear on him more than people think taxing an already overrated starting rotation, still they have former Dodger All-Star Mike Sciosscia so that's a bonus)
3. Seattle Mariners (won't finish in last, won't finish in first but the kid Hernandez will make strides toward becoming the next Pedro, so if the M's play their cards right they might contend next year and for a while to come)
4. Texas Rangers (man can they hit, too bad they have almost no one to pitch and they play in a veritable band box, Gagne won't be nearly as helpful to a team not built around pitching and defense and once the temp starts spiking in Arlington watch how the Rangers fade)
Overall Breakdown - Actually most of these teams are fairly close, a few breaks and the M's and Rangers could push for the division. Mostly the benefit of the doubt has to go to Beane and Co in green for their stellar regular season record over the last decade+.
Well, there you have it. The cheese' 2007 regular season predictions. Only 6 months to see how close he got it...
AL East
1. New York Yankees (ARod hit .290/35/121 in a "bad season," add to that greater pitching depth and a somewhat younger, and probably healthier, lineup and the Yanks will win their 10th! division crown in a row)
2. Boston Red Sox - Wild Card Berth (better rotation, upgraded lineup [though one can pray JD Drew goes down with a season ending injury] and Papelbon back in the bullpen will see the Bo'Sox back to the playoffs)
3. Toronto Blue Jays (poor Jay's fans, no matter how much money you spend you can't catch the behemoths on top, at least Halliday might win another Cy Young)
4. Tampa Bay Devil Rays (look at that, the D-Rays have some nice young talent, and Scott Kazmir could have a break out year, so a non-last place finish is entirely possible)
5. Baltimore Orioles (its a sad state of affairs when the O's look worse than the Devil Rays, if Cal Ripken were dead he'd be rolling in his grave, Eric Bedard and Miguel Tejada should both demand trades so they don't waste any more productive years in Angelos' cursed shadow)
Overall Breakdown - Comes down to NY and Beantown, as everyone assumed it would. The Yanks lost some bat in trading Sheffield, but they don't hurt for firepower, and the improved rotation and bench depth make them the team to beat. For the other non-NY and Boston teams, they should simply be moved to other divisions so that they might make the post season more than once every lunar eclipse. Of course, not into the AL Central cause, god is that a scary division.
AL Central
1. Minnesota Twins (yes they have rotation concerns past a certain left-handed wizard named Santana, but they have a ton of hitters, a great manager and GM, and they played absolutely hellish in the second half last year, plus 4 division titles in 6 years ain't nothin' to scoff at)
2. Detroit Tigers (last years pennant winners should have walked away with the division, but were overtaken by the Twins on the final day of the season, no reason to think they can't win the division other than the Twins being so good and so experienced in pennant drives)
3. Cleveland Indians (their run differential from a year ago points to them having some tough breaks in 06, if Sabathia has a solid season this is a team poised for a break...or would be in they didn't play in this division)
4. Chicago White Sox (two years ago they won a WS title, this offseason they made moves that might turn out to be genius in a year or two but weakened their pitching in the short term, would probably run away with a division crown in just about any other division, but...)
5. Kansas City Royals (poor Royals fans, nearly 20 years of suckage, at least that profit sharing has allowed them to spend some money, although poorly [Gil Meche, really?], but maybe they can hold on to some of that talent starting to crop up out of their farm system
Overall Breakdown - This is a division that could produce a 90 win team in 4th place, and send only one team into the playoffs, it's just that scary good. In fact, any of the top four are interchangeable in some regards. Bit like the NL Central, actually, but here it's because everyone's so talented, as opposed to the mediocrity that reigns in the NL counterpart.
AL West
1. Oakland Athletics (no concrete reason to pick them, other than the fact that Billy Beane's still GM over in Oaktown)
2. Anaheim Angels of Anaheim CA in Orange County where Anaheim is (more talent, on paper, than the A's, but the cheese thinks Gary Matthews Jr. is going to be a bust, Garrett Anderson is in decline, and there's no real protection for Vlad, plus Colon's 350 lbs. is going to wear on him more than people think taxing an already overrated starting rotation, still they have former Dodger All-Star Mike Sciosscia so that's a bonus)
3. Seattle Mariners (won't finish in last, won't finish in first but the kid Hernandez will make strides toward becoming the next Pedro, so if the M's play their cards right they might contend next year and for a while to come)
4. Texas Rangers (man can they hit, too bad they have almost no one to pitch and they play in a veritable band box, Gagne won't be nearly as helpful to a team not built around pitching and defense and once the temp starts spiking in Arlington watch how the Rangers fade)
Overall Breakdown - Actually most of these teams are fairly close, a few breaks and the M's and Rangers could push for the division. Mostly the benefit of the doubt has to go to Beane and Co in green for their stellar regular season record over the last decade+.
Well, there you have it. The cheese' 2007 regular season predictions. Only 6 months to see how close he got it...
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
Against his better judgement, the cheese will not throw in the towel, yet.
If you were paying attention, then you know that the 2007 baseball season officially opened yesterday. The Dodgers were in Milwaukee to open up against the Brewers. Now, the fact that the Dodgers garnered all of 2 hits, scored one run (on a Kent solo shot), and lost 7-1 might, in years passed, alarmed the cheese. But Ben Sheets, the oft-injured defacto ace in the land of beer, is actually healthy right now, and was at his absolute best yesterday. Plus, the Brewers are the cheese pick to win the NL Central (see below). And even though he wasn't exactly in top form, Lowe wasn't getting any close calls, so hey, there's still 161 games to play.
Even though everyone and his brother has made their predictions, the cheese will take a crack at it beginning with the National League...
NL East
1. NY Mets (even with a bunch of 80 year olds as a starting rotation this team will be hard to beat)
2. Atlanta Braves - Wild Card Berth (Bobby Cox doesn't have enough to overtake the Mets, but he'll see his team back to the post-season
3. Philadelphia Phillies - (Great offense, questionable defense, shoddy manager, near inept GM, and did you know Ryan Howard is actually OLDER than Albert Pujols?)
4. Florida Marlins (Mets, Braves and Phils will all be close, the Marlins won't, but their kids will make strides)
5. Washington Nationals (why did MLB even move them from Montreal? Now the fans in DC have to put up with this perennially lost franchise)
Overall Breakdown - the top three will make this division fairly competitive (i.e., difficult for the other two teams), and while the Phils have more talent than Atlanta, they're also saddled with Charlie Manual leading the team. Expect another year of under performance from the team from cheese steak land.
NL Central
1. Milwaukee Brewers (bit of a dark horse, maybe, but a healthy Sheets, Fielder and Co means this team can flat out play, and they're lucky enough to be in the weakest division in baseball)
2. St. Louis Cardinals (WS winners notwithstanding, last year was a huge fluke. Even with Pujols and Carpenter this is a .500 team)
3. Houston Astros (the offense will be better with a healthy Ensberg and Carlos Lee around to bolster/protect Berkman, but much of that will be negated by the 700+ errors Lee will commit in left field. After Oswalt they have no one to pitch)
4. Chicago Cubs (so much money spent for so little, Soriano can't play adequate defense anywhere, and why bring Ted Lilly to a hitter's park? Maybe they will 80 games, or maybe they'll win only 60)
5. Cincinnati Reds (had a decent run in 06 until the stretch, probably happen again since this team isn't particularly deep in any area, and their best hitter might strike out 200 times)
6. Pittsburgh Pirates (some decent guys on the roster, but a complete lack of vision from the top down means that the once proud franchise can expect another losing season)
Overall Breakdown - A defensable case could be made for any of these teams winning the division (though the Pirates would be a stretch, it COULD be possible). Really, it's going to be exactly like last year with the team reaching the 84 win mark (granted that's only three games over .500, and last year the Cards only won 82) taking the division crown. Really, you could just pull names out of a hat and have as good a chance of picking the winner.
NL West
1. Los Angeles Dodgers (upgraded rotation, strong bullpen, solid lineup. No real "homerun" threat, but they didn't have one last year and still led the league in hitting and finished third in runs scored).
2. San Diego Padres (having Greg Maddux and David Wells at the back of the rotation will tax the bullpen all season, and the bullpen is what really saved the Pads last year. Peavy will try and compensate and pitch deeper into games, he's not known for great durability, so expect a small/lingering to medium injury to hamper him, thus deflating the Pads chances at the post season)
3. Arizona Diamondbacks (next year they might be really tough, but this year they might be a bit too young, don't expect much from Randy Johnson even though he is back in the NL)
4. San Francisco Giants (why the hell would anyone sign Barry Bonds, even the Giro's, is still a mystery, add to that fact that there isn't a starter is SF under the age of 31, they're now saddled with Zito's ridiculous contract, and they have exactly one guy, a pitcher, who might get better in the future and the Giants fans are looking at a miserable time over the next several years)
5. Colorado Rockies (they've got a decent core of young talent, but without the humodor this year pitching a mile above sea level will be terrible yet again)
Overall Breakdown - It'll come down to LA and SD, again, but this time both teams won't make it to the playoffs with the East being so strong. All in all, there isn't a great team here, but the top three should all be close, and SF might hang around for most of the way if Bonds is reasonably healthy. LA gets the nod for its pitching depth and lineup depth. Hell, they had to send a guy (Loney) who hit .380 in AAA last season (and .440 in the spring this year) back to Las Vegas because there's no room for him on the 25 man roster. Maybe this year the Dodgers might win A playoff game, but the cheese isn't getting his hopes up.
Even though everyone and his brother has made their predictions, the cheese will take a crack at it beginning with the National League...
NL East
1. NY Mets (even with a bunch of 80 year olds as a starting rotation this team will be hard to beat)
2. Atlanta Braves - Wild Card Berth (Bobby Cox doesn't have enough to overtake the Mets, but he'll see his team back to the post-season
3. Philadelphia Phillies - (Great offense, questionable defense, shoddy manager, near inept GM, and did you know Ryan Howard is actually OLDER than Albert Pujols?)
4. Florida Marlins (Mets, Braves and Phils will all be close, the Marlins won't, but their kids will make strides)
5. Washington Nationals (why did MLB even move them from Montreal? Now the fans in DC have to put up with this perennially lost franchise)
Overall Breakdown - the top three will make this division fairly competitive (i.e., difficult for the other two teams), and while the Phils have more talent than Atlanta, they're also saddled with Charlie Manual leading the team. Expect another year of under performance from the team from cheese steak land.
NL Central
1. Milwaukee Brewers (bit of a dark horse, maybe, but a healthy Sheets, Fielder and Co means this team can flat out play, and they're lucky enough to be in the weakest division in baseball)
2. St. Louis Cardinals (WS winners notwithstanding, last year was a huge fluke. Even with Pujols and Carpenter this is a .500 team)
3. Houston Astros (the offense will be better with a healthy Ensberg and Carlos Lee around to bolster/protect Berkman, but much of that will be negated by the 700+ errors Lee will commit in left field. After Oswalt they have no one to pitch)
4. Chicago Cubs (so much money spent for so little, Soriano can't play adequate defense anywhere, and why bring Ted Lilly to a hitter's park? Maybe they will 80 games, or maybe they'll win only 60)
5. Cincinnati Reds (had a decent run in 06 until the stretch, probably happen again since this team isn't particularly deep in any area, and their best hitter might strike out 200 times)
6. Pittsburgh Pirates (some decent guys on the roster, but a complete lack of vision from the top down means that the once proud franchise can expect another losing season)
Overall Breakdown - A defensable case could be made for any of these teams winning the division (though the Pirates would be a stretch, it COULD be possible). Really, it's going to be exactly like last year with the team reaching the 84 win mark (granted that's only three games over .500, and last year the Cards only won 82) taking the division crown. Really, you could just pull names out of a hat and have as good a chance of picking the winner.
NL West
1. Los Angeles Dodgers (upgraded rotation, strong bullpen, solid lineup. No real "homerun" threat, but they didn't have one last year and still led the league in hitting and finished third in runs scored).
2. San Diego Padres (having Greg Maddux and David Wells at the back of the rotation will tax the bullpen all season, and the bullpen is what really saved the Pads last year. Peavy will try and compensate and pitch deeper into games, he's not known for great durability, so expect a small/lingering to medium injury to hamper him, thus deflating the Pads chances at the post season)
3. Arizona Diamondbacks (next year they might be really tough, but this year they might be a bit too young, don't expect much from Randy Johnson even though he is back in the NL)
4. San Francisco Giants (why the hell would anyone sign Barry Bonds, even the Giro's, is still a mystery, add to that fact that there isn't a starter is SF under the age of 31, they're now saddled with Zito's ridiculous contract, and they have exactly one guy, a pitcher, who might get better in the future and the Giants fans are looking at a miserable time over the next several years)
5. Colorado Rockies (they've got a decent core of young talent, but without the humodor this year pitching a mile above sea level will be terrible yet again)
Overall Breakdown - It'll come down to LA and SD, again, but this time both teams won't make it to the playoffs with the East being so strong. All in all, there isn't a great team here, but the top three should all be close, and SF might hang around for most of the way if Bonds is reasonably healthy. LA gets the nod for its pitching depth and lineup depth. Hell, they had to send a guy (Loney) who hit .380 in AAA last season (and .440 in the spring this year) back to Las Vegas because there's no room for him on the 25 man roster. Maybe this year the Dodgers might win A playoff game, but the cheese isn't getting his hopes up.
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
Apparently, it was a slow sports day...
because the cheese was shocked when, during the 10 o'clock news on channel 11, highlights from a Concordia University basketball game were shown. Thinking this had to be some weird aberration, the cheese was further shocked to find other news outlets covering it as well.
All the attention almost, but not quite, brought about feelings of pride for the cheese' alma mater. But then he remembered what going there was like, and you know, all the feelings of good will seeped away in the vast emptiness in the cheese' soul that comes with having a BA in Humanities.
All the attention almost, but not quite, brought about feelings of pride for the cheese' alma mater. But then he remembered what going there was like, and you know, all the feelings of good will seeped away in the vast emptiness in the cheese' soul that comes with having a BA in Humanities.
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Crazy Comic Covers
I have gotta say that the Marvel Zombie artists have some crazy ideas for covers. Basically they take classic covers and zombify them. Check out these covers for Marvel Zombies vs Army of Darkness #1. Nothing quite beats zombie captain america punching out zombie Hitler.
Sunday, March 18, 2007
A small sampling of thoughts that have little interest to anyone other than myself and have absolutely nothing in common with each other...
It is, roughly, 10:30 PM on Sunday evening as the cheese begins typing this. The actual posting time will no doubt be much later as the cheese is alternately procrastinating on both homework and work work. Both the princess and momma_cheese are in bed, as Sunday night has become the cheese only time to actually "do" stuff. Last Sunday, for instance, the cheese stayed up until 4 AM (Monday morning) finishing a paper. After a thoroughly unrefreshing 3 hours of sleep the cheese woke up to feed the kid.
Tonight does not seem to be destined for such a late bed time. Nevertheless, here's some things that have been on the cheese' mind of late....
-A short list of various points of advice for Tengu (or any other new fathers out there in cheeselandia), in no particular order
1. At some point, you will get poo on or around your face. Perhaps this has already occurred. If not, accept the eventuality of it and try not to freak out when it does occur.
2. As soon as he starts grabbing on to things, things will start going in his mouth.
3. At least for the princess, books seem to be incredibly delicious, so you might want to stick to board books in your living room.
4. The cheese hears that some time away from the baby is good for parents. Since the cheese only gets time away for work/school/homework, he'll have to take other's words for this, but you might want to try it out.
5. Classical music is particularly good at soothing the princess when she's upset...off key renditions of Itsy Bitsy Spider, I'm a Little Teapot, and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star work well also.
-It's a few months late, sure, but the cheese isn't up on music/movies/anything like he used to be. Regardless, this band is pretty much awesome from top to bottom so check em' out.
-The cheese has said it before, and he'll say it again, but James Blaylock is a seriously fucking good writer!
-With only two weeks left in spring training the Dodgers seem to be blessed with a ridiculous surplus in pitching. They haven't yet been able to parlay that into a trade for a big bat, but as the season rolls on, the trade deadline approaches, and teams fall out of contention, this state of affairs may change. On the other hand, the Dodgers do have some serious speed at the top of the order, followed by a number of very good, selective, and not overly prone to strikeouts hitters, so maybe they don't actually need another bat. They made the playoffs (though, let's not dwell on the resulting three games) last year without a legitimate home run threat, and they seem even better this year.
-The cheese has enjoyed coffee for many years now, but with 4 hours of sleep a night becoming a reality, and the ebb in energy the cheese has felt as he approaches the end of his 20's, coffee is not so much an enjoyment as a necessity that rivals air.
Tonight does not seem to be destined for such a late bed time. Nevertheless, here's some things that have been on the cheese' mind of late....
-A short list of various points of advice for Tengu (or any other new fathers out there in cheeselandia), in no particular order
1. At some point, you will get poo on or around your face. Perhaps this has already occurred. If not, accept the eventuality of it and try not to freak out when it does occur.
2. As soon as he starts grabbing on to things, things will start going in his mouth.
3. At least for the princess, books seem to be incredibly delicious, so you might want to stick to board books in your living room.
4. The cheese hears that some time away from the baby is good for parents. Since the cheese only gets time away for work/school/homework, he'll have to take other's words for this, but you might want to try it out.
5. Classical music is particularly good at soothing the princess when she's upset...off key renditions of Itsy Bitsy Spider, I'm a Little Teapot, and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star work well also.
-It's a few months late, sure, but the cheese isn't up on music/movies/anything like he used to be. Regardless, this band is pretty much awesome from top to bottom so check em' out.
-The cheese has said it before, and he'll say it again, but James Blaylock is a seriously fucking good writer!
-With only two weeks left in spring training the Dodgers seem to be blessed with a ridiculous surplus in pitching. They haven't yet been able to parlay that into a trade for a big bat, but as the season rolls on, the trade deadline approaches, and teams fall out of contention, this state of affairs may change. On the other hand, the Dodgers do have some serious speed at the top of the order, followed by a number of very good, selective, and not overly prone to strikeouts hitters, so maybe they don't actually need another bat. They made the playoffs (though, let's not dwell on the resulting three games) last year without a legitimate home run threat, and they seem even better this year.
-The cheese has enjoyed coffee for many years now, but with 4 hours of sleep a night becoming a reality, and the ebb in energy the cheese has felt as he approaches the end of his 20's, coffee is not so much an enjoyment as a necessity that rivals air.
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
This guy is pretty damn hard.
This guy, Lance Mackey,who just won his second consecutive Iditarod this week (just 12 days after winning another 1000 race with, essentially, the same dog team), is now high on the list of the cheese' personal lords and saviors.
He still falls below Neil Gaiman, Terry Pratchett, James Blaylock, and Bear Grylls (what's that, you haven't seen Man vs. Wild, well then you're missing out my friend), but he's probably slightly above Steven Gerrard and the guys at Penny Arcade, so that says something.
He still falls below Neil Gaiman, Terry Pratchett, James Blaylock, and Bear Grylls (what's that, you haven't seen Man vs. Wild, well then you're missing out my friend), but he's probably slightly above Steven Gerrard and the guys at Penny Arcade, so that says something.
Thursday, March 08, 2007
I present Sir Riley Peter Tom
With Lord Cheese's permission I would like to induct a new defender of the realm.
Friday, March 02, 2007
the big cheese "big" update
Well, maybe not too big, it is 12:30 in the ante meridiem after all. But the cheese has been quite lax in his postings lately, except for results of the occasional comic themed web quiz (and if only the cheese lived in the comic book world he would be Apocalypse and alternately get it on with Scarlet Witch and Psylocke.....sweeeet). So, here then is a short list of goings on in the cheese' life
-While the birth of princess Isabella was joyous, it came at a not entirely perfect time, but had she not been born last year then the cheese would not have been qualified (read: a father) to get his newest part time job as a Writer/Researcher for Dads Adventure. And even though he is only working a scant 15 hours a week for this organization (and some of that is at home...) this second part time occupation has forced the parents cheese to place the princess into day care twice a week. Tuesday, in fact, marked the princess' very first foray into a world where she interacts with other children for an extended period of time. It was, needless to say, a difficult day for the adults, but the princess seemed to really enjoy it.
-Work on The Chronicles II: Son of the Chronicles continues at a decent pace, and since the cheese is enrolled in two writing courses this semester he predicts that there may be more than 100 pages completed by the time May rolls around. Now if only there were time finish up The Chronicles I: Father of The Chronicles II: Son of the Chronicles...
-In case you citizens were unaware, the Dodgers played their first spring training game yesterday (Thursday) which means we can all settle back for a nice 7 months of America's pasttime...and if we're (and by we, of course, the cheese means all decent people, or Dodgers fans) lucky we'll actually get a few playoff wins this year.
-And lastly/most importantly a month ago......
Since then the cheese clan has also seen the rise of crawling, which, as one might guess, makes the princess much more prone to hurting herself/means dad needs to pay WAY more attention when she's playing on the ground, and she is no longer content to simply be in the playpen. And very recently she's take to pulling herself up on to her feet in her crib. Basically, the princess is a genius....the cheese predicts that in another six months she'll be tackling non-Euclidean geometry and composing her first symphony.
-While the birth of princess Isabella was joyous, it came at a not entirely perfect time, but had she not been born last year then the cheese would not have been qualified (read: a father) to get his newest part time job as a Writer/Researcher for Dads Adventure. And even though he is only working a scant 15 hours a week for this organization (and some of that is at home...) this second part time occupation has forced the parents cheese to place the princess into day care twice a week. Tuesday, in fact, marked the princess' very first foray into a world where she interacts with other children for an extended period of time. It was, needless to say, a difficult day for the adults, but the princess seemed to really enjoy it.
-Work on The Chronicles II: Son of the Chronicles continues at a decent pace, and since the cheese is enrolled in two writing courses this semester he predicts that there may be more than 100 pages completed by the time May rolls around. Now if only there were time finish up The Chronicles I: Father of The Chronicles II: Son of the Chronicles...
-In case you citizens were unaware, the Dodgers played their first spring training game yesterday (Thursday) which means we can all settle back for a nice 7 months of America's pasttime...and if we're (and by we, of course, the cheese means all decent people, or Dodgers fans) lucky we'll actually get a few playoff wins this year.
-And lastly/most importantly a month ago......
Since then the cheese clan has also seen the rise of crawling, which, as one might guess, makes the princess much more prone to hurting herself/means dad needs to pay WAY more attention when she's playing on the ground, and she is no longer content to simply be in the playpen. And very recently she's take to pulling herself up on to her feet in her crib. Basically, the princess is a genius....the cheese predicts that in another six months she'll be tackling non-Euclidean geometry and composing her first symphony.
Thursday, February 22, 2007
Mwahahaha!!!!
Your results:
You are Apocalypse
Click here to take the Super Villain Personality Test
Thanks, once again, to Mojo...
You are Apocalypse
| You believe in survival of the fittest and you believe that you are the fittest. |
Click here to take the Super Villain Personality Test
Thanks, once again, to Mojo...
Friday, February 16, 2007
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Sometimes things are much better than one might expect.
Last night saw the first of six writers visit Chapman University for this year's John Fowles Literary Forum. This was not something the cheese was particularly interested in, though he was required to attend as he is currently enrolled in the class that is taught in conjunction with the Visiting Writers program.
But the night was quite illuminating. The "theme" of this year's Forum is Latin American writers, and while this is not an area of particular interest to the cheese, the fact that this year marks the 10th anniversary of the program means that there is also an art installation from 3 Latin American artists to go along with the readings. All in all it made for a great experience last night.
The first writer, Carmen Boullosa, was surprisingly fresh, and her views on literature and writing were illuminating. Her reading, though, was drop dead genius (it came from a novel that was not read by the cheese' class, though that particular work has not shot to the top of the cheese' "must read" list).
Writing, in the cheese limited experience, is a solitary endeavor. It's lonely, difficult, and in the words of Ms. Boullosa, "a vampire...writing will take everything out of your soul." But sometimes its nice to remind yourself that there are others who have struggled with the same things and come out of the hard times with finished work and made a career out of it.
But the night was quite illuminating. The "theme" of this year's Forum is Latin American writers, and while this is not an area of particular interest to the cheese, the fact that this year marks the 10th anniversary of the program means that there is also an art installation from 3 Latin American artists to go along with the readings. All in all it made for a great experience last night.
The first writer, Carmen Boullosa, was surprisingly fresh, and her views on literature and writing were illuminating. Her reading, though, was drop dead genius (it came from a novel that was not read by the cheese' class, though that particular work has not shot to the top of the cheese' "must read" list).
Writing, in the cheese limited experience, is a solitary endeavor. It's lonely, difficult, and in the words of Ms. Boullosa, "a vampire...writing will take everything out of your soul." But sometimes its nice to remind yourself that there are others who have struggled with the same things and come out of the hard times with finished work and made a career out of it.
Monday, January 29, 2007
The cheese is...
 | I am:Hal Clement (Harry C. Stubbs)A quiet and underrated master of "hard science" fiction who, among other things, foresaw integrated circuits back in the 1940s. |
Thanks mojo!
Thursday, January 25, 2007
Sean Bean is, we can all agree, the greatest living actor...
Really, anything starring Sean Bean, even something as bad as 
say, National Treasure, is still good simply because Bean deigns to lend his quasi-godlike visage to it. And while the cheese hasn't seen The Hitcher yet, he did already complain to momma_cheese that is seems clear Bean's character dies at the end of the film, which is ridiculous because if Bean did decide to go on a homicidal rampage across some desert highways, there is no way in hell Sophia Bush and miscellaneous "good-looking" guy could stop him...and so this web comic gives a fairly satisfying compromise to the dilemma...
As an interesting aside, the cheese stumbled upon these at the ol' bookmines and is now racking his brains on how he might save up for them...
say, National Treasure, is still good simply because Bean deigns to lend his quasi-godlike visage to it. And while the cheese hasn't seen The Hitcher yet, he did already complain to momma_cheese that is seems clear Bean's character dies at the end of the film, which is ridiculous because if Bean did decide to go on a homicidal rampage across some desert highways, there is no way in hell Sophia Bush and miscellaneous "good-looking" guy could stop him...and so this web comic gives a fairly satisfying compromise to the dilemma...
As an interesting aside, the cheese stumbled upon these at the ol' bookmines and is now racking his brains on how he might save up for them...
Thursday, January 18, 2007
No more regular soda...EVER!
Toward the end of a fairly stressful day, one in which the cheese found himself fighting off his second cold in three weeks (the blame goes to Suavo, even though he duly warned the cheese...), financial issues continued to cause stress, and a cold sore the size of a mid-size former Soviet state had blossomed on the cheese mouth, he decided to indulge himself and drink, for the first time in three weeks, a regular soda with all its (supposed) high-fructose corn syrupy goodness. Alas, an upset stomach, faint dizziness, and general malaise was all the cheese got from his ill advised indulgence.
A pox on thy house, REGULAR SODA! Never again shall you pass the cheese' lips!
A pox on thy house, REGULAR SODA! Never again shall you pass the cheese' lips!
Monday, January 15, 2007
Don’t judge a book by its cover, yes....but don’t judge a book cover by itself either.
Four or five weeks ago I would have very likely agreed with this pronouncement that the cover to Jim Cramer’s Mad Money is surely a ridiculous thing. But something odd has happened to the cheese recently. As part of his four-fold plan(blog link) to improve himself the cheese is trying to be much more opened minded in regards to a number of things.
In this case, the cheese resolution #3 has motivated him to learn something, anything, about the stock market. So the past few weeks the cheese has taken in a lot of CNBC. Now it just so happens that Mr. Cramer, him of the crazy cover has a show on that very network. At first glance this Cramer guy seems a thoroughly schizoid, bizarro dimension version, of a stock analyst. His show plays something akin to a cross between a morning “drive-time” radio bazaar and a PBS program. On the one hand, it’s terribly fast paced with a lot of sound and visual do-daddery, while he’s relaying a veritable mountain of information about the stock market in general, and the business world at large.
Apparently Cramer ran a hedge-fund for something like 15 years where, in his own words, he made “more money than anyone has a real right to.” And the opening to his book claims that he does the show (and now book) to help people realize their own goals in the stock market. The cheese has watched the show here and there (cause with a five month old, watching something daily is just not possible) for a few weeks now and the cheese can’t count how many times he’s heard Cramer say that anyone, no matter economic or education level, can do a better job managing his stocks/money (as long as he has the conviction to do the work/research required) than any investment banker, stock broker, financial planner, etc. And that’s a fairly empowering statement, especially to someone like the cheese who doesn’t have a whole lot of disposable cash lying around but is interested in investing.
That’s not to say that the cheese agrees with everything Cramer says...like he values how a company performs more than how it treats its employees or the type of business it is. Cramer named Altria (parent company of Phillip Morris, Phillip Morris International, and Kraft) as his pick of the year because he believes the three branches will split off into independent companies, but even if the cheese had money just now, he doubts he could purchase stock from a tobacco company...
So what does any of this have to do with the ol’ book cover? Well, as part of his resolution regimen the cheese recently read Rich Dad, Poor Dad. No doubt, those of you who know the cheese well think this last sentence is some sort of joke. But no, friends, it is true.
Let us take a moment to reflect back on days when the cheese was an undergraduate. He worked one year in his school’s writing center, and another two years as a TA, grading papers from intro lit courses. Suffice it to say, those three years saw the cheese read a lot of bad writing. Not coincidently, whenever the cheese read a particularly sorry paper, you know, the kind that makes one question the school’s admission policies/department, nine times out of 10 that paper came from a business major (and as a sidenote, Rich Dad, Poor Dad wasn’t particularly well written either, but more on that in a minute). The cheese, in fact, spent a good deal of time as an undergraduate talking badly about business in general, business majors specifically, and how most in the business program could hardly speak correctly, let alone construct a coherent paragraph and set it down on paper. But all those business graduates had to have learned something, and in occurs to the cheese that what they were learning might very well be pertinent to his intended occupation.
Robert Kiyosaki, the author of Rich Dad, Poor Dad relates a store that truly hit home with the cheese, and it goes like this...
Some time ago Kiyosaki was in Singapore for a business conference and had agreed to be interviewed by a female journalist working for one of the local papers. It just so happens that on some of his previous trips there Kiyosaki had actually read some of the articles this particular journalist had written and thought very highly of her as both a journalist and a writer. At the end of the interview the woman asked Kiyosaki if he might giver her some tips on being a published author, as she had a novel that she had written but had been unsuccessful at getting anyone to publish it. Kiyosaki suggested the woman take a course, or attend a conference, on sales. She immediately became indignant and responded with something like “I don’t want to be a salesman! I want to be a writer!” Kiyosaki then picks up his book and says “The cover of this says best selling author, not best writing author.” And then went on to explain that she might be the greatest writer in the world, and that he believed she probably had written a very good book, but that if she didn’t learn to, effectively, sell herself she’d have a very hard time getting published. The woman, apparently, seemed to miss the point because she ended their conversation by storming off.
Her attitude mirrors, almost exactly, the cheese’ attitude of many years ago. The cheese wanted to be a “writer.” He was above the trivial concerns of money or the business of how one goes about actually getting paid to write. Since then, though, the cheese has realized two things. 1) The cheese is not now, and will never be a “writer.” That is, what the cheese writes is not art. Entertaining, sure. Artistic, no. The cheese has taken the view that there are, in fact, very few writers who are artists. Most writers, in fact, are craftsmen. The difference is that while both an artist and a craftsman may work with, say, clay the artist might produce The Thinker while the craftsman might produce a bowl. The bowl may be beautiful in its own right, but will never rival the beauty of what the artists makes. Then again, the bowl has some utility while no one would think of eating a meal off of a sculpture. The utility inherent in works produced by writing craftsmen is entertainment, pure and simple. That’s not to say that crafted writing cannot illuminate truth about the world we live in or the human condition, but it must still, at its core, entertain the reader. Artistic writing, however, may be a clear work of genius, may ponder the most important questions about existence, and still might not entertain. Take, Moby Dick, which the cheese read for the first time this last semester. Three or four more readings, at least, are required before the cheese can get any type of handle on it. Doubtless there are few who have ever read it that would argue its power as a piece of art, and there would probably be very few more who would call it entirely entertaining.
But Kiyosaki’s story is the reality of the world. If the cheese ever has a hope of selling The Chronicles than he must learn to sell himself, and his work.
Again, what does this have to do with the Cramer cover....well, the way in which this site goes about trashing it shows the cheese two things, first she’s probably never seen his show, and second probably hasn’t read the book. Maybe that’s not the point, but anyone who’s ever seen this show, even for just 60 seconds, would know that the cover couldn’t have looked any different. Cramer is just that way. The cheese isn’t sure if he does lines before the show goes live, but it wouldn’t be a big shock to find out that was the case. The guy runs on pure adrenaline for 60 minutes, and in light of the show, actually, the cover is rather subdued. In the interest of full disclosure the cheese will say he hasn’t yet finished the book. But one thing becomes increasingly clear as one reads it (or spends any serious amount of time watching the show), the guy really wants to help ordinary people, even those without a lot of disposable income, make money in the stock market.
Now the attitude that the article’s author takes in relation to the cover reminds the cheese of how he might have responded 10 years ago, or 5 years ago, or even last year for that matter. The cheese has always fancied himself open minded, but the truth is, we all have a prejudices. But to be truly open minded one must own up to his prejudices, and work to turn them inside out. The cheese is going out to find a job with a fortune 500 company any time soon. But maybe he can learn something from all those people/disciplines that he once derided with scorn. And certainly not everything he learns will be useful. But the cheese believes that the true definition of wisdom is realizing where your knowledge is deficient, accepting that one can always learn something from every person or discipline of knowledge you encounter, and continually trying to expand what you know with an attitude of humility (i.e. realizing you will never know everything).
Thursday, January 11, 2007
Biggest News in American Soccer, Ever!
David Beckham, ye of multiple English Premier League, FA Cup, and even a Champions League medal to his credit will be joining the LA Galaxy in July.
Recently the MLS amended their salary cap rules with what, even at the time, was known as the "Beckham Rule." This rule, essentially, allows each team to sign one international player at a salary significantly larger than would have been allowed under the old 2 million dollar per-team cap (also, teams can trade there rights to a designated player, but no team is allowed more than two such players).
It was long known that Beckham intended to play in the US at the end of his career. And while he's currently 31, which is a bit old for any soccer player not named Gary Speed, he's still got something left. That being said, it was assumed he wouldn't hop the pond for a couple years yet. That was, of course, until the current La Liga campaign began. This year Beck's has made only 7 starts for Real Madrid through all competitions (though he has come on a dozen times as a sub). That's not nearly enough for a player with Beckham's stature. So once his current deal with Real runs out on June 30 he'll be wearing Galaxy yellow.
The cheese might actually attend an MLS match now...
Recently the MLS amended their salary cap rules with what, even at the time, was known as the "Beckham Rule." This rule, essentially, allows each team to sign one international player at a salary significantly larger than would have been allowed under the old 2 million dollar per-team cap (also, teams can trade there rights to a designated player, but no team is allowed more than two such players).
It was long known that Beckham intended to play in the US at the end of his career. And while he's currently 31, which is a bit old for any soccer player not named Gary Speed, he's still got something left. That being said, it was assumed he wouldn't hop the pond for a couple years yet. That was, of course, until the current La Liga campaign began. This year Beck's has made only 7 starts for Real Madrid through all competitions (though he has come on a dozen times as a sub). That's not nearly enough for a player with Beckham's stature. So once his current deal with Real runs out on June 30 he'll be wearing Galaxy yellow.
The cheese might actually attend an MLS match now...
Wednesday, January 10, 2007
Best Commercial Ever
Aint it cool news posted this commercial and I thought I would share it with you. If you don't get it the first time, watch it again.
Friday, January 05, 2007
That time of year.
The cheese has never been too hip to the whole "new year's resolution" thing. He believes that if one wants to affect change in one's life, then any day of the year is the day to do so, rather than some arbitrarily decided upon date that "begins" a new calendar year (cause remember, a year is measured by the time it takes our planet to circle the sun, a circle as we all know, has no real beginning or end).
Nevertheless, it seems a particularly pertinent moment in the cheese' life to reassess and revalue certain things. As all loyal citizens of cheeselandia know Princess Isabella is growing by the minute (as the cheese writes this, in fact, she is rolling about on the living room floor with various plush friends).
And it is the princess, not surprisingly, that has spurred much of the cheese desire to change certain things in his life.
Resolution #1. Cultivate a more positive attitude
Look, by nature the cheese is sarcastic, cynical and generally annoyed with humanity. But it occurs to the cheese that he does not necessarily wish such an attitude on the princess. Truth be told, the cheese has often felt himself grudgingly admire people who are mostly positive. And perhaps there is some truth in the idea that to foster good things in one's life, one must start with himself. Sure it sounds a bit "new agey" but it is the underlying (though wholly simplified) principle of certain eastern philosophies. All in all, the cheese wants more than anything for his daughter to be happy and excited about life, as opposed to always being bitter and pessimistic.
Resolution #2. Change eating habits
It has now been four days since the cheese last had a soda. More than that, though, the cheese is on an overall diet. The cheese truly believes that there may be a place in his life for soda, though it should be a very small place. And while the days of consuming two gallons of Pepsi in a day are long gone, even two cans of soda a day is much too much. First off, the cheese metabolism is not what it once was, and secondly, no man who is barely 5'7" should weigh 185 lbs. Currently the cheese and mrs_cheese are on the "cleansing" portion off their diet which will last two weeks total. Then the cheese gets fruit again, thank god. And, in fact, the diet hasn't been that bad so far, though the craptacularness of it has been blunted by a head cold and minor back injury... But the cheese really doesn't want the princess growing up believing (like the cheese did) that it is perfectly fine if all one's liquid intake comes from aluminum cans.
Resolution #3. Take an active role in securing the family's future
Right now the cheese clan has two different retirement funds and life insurance policies on all three of us (yes, that includes the princess, but it's more about her children's future than about any money we might receive on the off chance she dies at a young age). And it recently occurred to the cheese he knows little to nothing about mutual funds, stocks, 401K's, or any other important component of this country's financial system. Now, in a perfect world there would be a fair and progressive tax system in this country that allowed for Social Security to continue on past next year or so, the real estate market would actually be affordable to middle income families and corporations would actually be taxed. But none of those things will probably ever happen in the cheese' lifetime. That being the case, the cheese needs to seriously increase his understanding of the major financial systems working in this country so that, on that sad day when the cheese passes onto the next phase, princess isabella will inherent a cheeselandia that is not a desolate wasteland peopled with illiterate peasants.
Resolution #4 Make a concerted effort to actually have a writing career
This might go without saying, but the Chronicles will be finished soon. This, though, is only the first step to becoming a published writer. As of this writing the cheese has already begun to formulate an actual plan of action on what to do once the novel is finished. In some ways luck plays a part in any artists attempt to make a living off of a craft, but the cheese believes that with the proper mental attitude and an actual blueprint for action, one might just be able to manufacture his own luck.
Well, that's the list. What about you, oh loyal citizens? Any resolutions out there?
P.S., the cheese went ahead and upgraded the blog to the new version, so in order to post you all might have to upgrade your accounts...
Nevertheless, it seems a particularly pertinent moment in the cheese' life to reassess and revalue certain things. As all loyal citizens of cheeselandia know Princess Isabella is growing by the minute (as the cheese writes this, in fact, she is rolling about on the living room floor with various plush friends).
And it is the princess, not surprisingly, that has spurred much of the cheese desire to change certain things in his life.
Resolution #1. Cultivate a more positive attitude
Look, by nature the cheese is sarcastic, cynical and generally annoyed with humanity. But it occurs to the cheese that he does not necessarily wish such an attitude on the princess. Truth be told, the cheese has often felt himself grudgingly admire people who are mostly positive. And perhaps there is some truth in the idea that to foster good things in one's life, one must start with himself. Sure it sounds a bit "new agey" but it is the underlying (though wholly simplified) principle of certain eastern philosophies. All in all, the cheese wants more than anything for his daughter to be happy and excited about life, as opposed to always being bitter and pessimistic.
Resolution #2. Change eating habits
It has now been four days since the cheese last had a soda. More than that, though, the cheese is on an overall diet. The cheese truly believes that there may be a place in his life for soda, though it should be a very small place. And while the days of consuming two gallons of Pepsi in a day are long gone, even two cans of soda a day is much too much. First off, the cheese metabolism is not what it once was, and secondly, no man who is barely 5'7" should weigh 185 lbs. Currently the cheese and mrs_cheese are on the "cleansing" portion off their diet which will last two weeks total. Then the cheese gets fruit again, thank god. And, in fact, the diet hasn't been that bad so far, though the craptacularness of it has been blunted by a head cold and minor back injury... But the cheese really doesn't want the princess growing up believing (like the cheese did) that it is perfectly fine if all one's liquid intake comes from aluminum cans.
Resolution #3. Take an active role in securing the family's future
Right now the cheese clan has two different retirement funds and life insurance policies on all three of us (yes, that includes the princess, but it's more about her children's future than about any money we might receive on the off chance she dies at a young age). And it recently occurred to the cheese he knows little to nothing about mutual funds, stocks, 401K's, or any other important component of this country's financial system. Now, in a perfect world there would be a fair and progressive tax system in this country that allowed for Social Security to continue on past next year or so, the real estate market would actually be affordable to middle income families and corporations would actually be taxed. But none of those things will probably ever happen in the cheese' lifetime. That being the case, the cheese needs to seriously increase his understanding of the major financial systems working in this country so that, on that sad day when the cheese passes onto the next phase, princess isabella will inherent a cheeselandia that is not a desolate wasteland peopled with illiterate peasants.
Resolution #4 Make a concerted effort to actually have a writing career
This might go without saying, but the Chronicles will be finished soon. This, though, is only the first step to becoming a published writer. As of this writing the cheese has already begun to formulate an actual plan of action on what to do once the novel is finished. In some ways luck plays a part in any artists attempt to make a living off of a craft, but the cheese believes that with the proper mental attitude and an actual blueprint for action, one might just be able to manufacture his own luck.
Well, that's the list. What about you, oh loyal citizens? Any resolutions out there?
P.S., the cheese went ahead and upgraded the blog to the new version, so in order to post you all might have to upgrade your accounts...
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