The odor of bratwurst, lager, cut grass, and millions of fanatics converging on Germany. Friday starts the 2006 World Cup, and the cheese will be updating this with Football themed posts for about the next month (with an occasional interruption from "real life"), so hold onto your hats loyal citizens of cheeselandia. Since our intrepid team didn't qualify for this years tournament (cause it's just the cheese and 10 cardboard cutouts of various star wars and comic book characters) the cheese is instructing all citizens to throw their support behind England.
What's that you say? We should be supporting the US. Well, first off, the US finds itself in the always sunny "group of death" with Italy, Ghana, and the Czech Republic. Advancing out of the group stage is not especially likely for Sam's Army. Plus, England fields former Liverpool wonderboy, and all around scoring wizard Michael Owen, not to mention current Liverpudlians wonder-captain Steven Gerrard, indomitable center-back Jaime Carragher, and freakishly tall super striker Peter Crouch. There are, of course, other teams fielding Reds (Spain, Holland, Germany, among others), but all citizens of cheeseland should be Liverpool fans by default.
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3 comments:
What about Manchester? Can we be fans of Manchester?
If by "manchester" you mean Manchester City, then the cheese will grudgingly allow it. If you mean Manchester United, then the cheese must pause a moment to swallow the bile that has crept into his throat.
Manchester United, aside from being representative of all that is wrong and evil in the world, has also been Liverpool's main rival for 60+ years (that's right Everton fans, to be considered a rival you have to actually compete, instead of just showing up and losing all the time).
If any citizen of cheeseland were found rooting for Man. U., then, the cheese would be forced to deal swift and brutal punishment in order to save the heathen's soul, and keep the moral fabric of all cheeelandia strong.
Then that someone would be flogged until his skin was flayed completely from his bones...or possibly just smacked in the back of the head.
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